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About Literature / Hobbyist Premium Member Garrison KellyMale/United States Recent Activity
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From Wednesday until today, up until now, I’ve had to go without my obligatory alone time. Because of this, I only wrote one measly poem during that time, I couldn’t catch up on the reading for the WSS contests (sorry, guys), and I was grumpy; very, very grumpy. For introverts like me, alone time isn’t just a luxury to be taken for granted; it’s a requirement. Recharging our batteries is the key to being able to relax after a long period of stress. Even extroverts can go on sensory overload from time to time, so alone time is important for them as well. Here’s how my four days of extreme human contact went:

On Wednesday and Thursday, both days were completely filled up time-wise with me helping my brother James move out of his apartment. He already had a head start on getting the bulkier pieces of furniture out of there, so it was just a matter of getting the little shit packed in boxes and cleaning the carpets and windows. Constant periods of heavy lifting can get on anybody’s nerves. Try lifting those heavy objects up and down two flights of wooden stairs that are falling apart and breaking on a regular basis. I’ve put my foot through two different steps during these moving days. That, and I’ve injured my knee going up and down those stairs. Even though I was grumpy and tired afterwards, it was all for a good cause: helping my brother get on with his life after being fired from a well-paying job.

On Friday, even though it was purely for entertainment and having a life event I can brag about on Face Book, I went to see Cavalera Conspiracy in Seattle along with their opening acts Sanction VIII, Lody Kong, Corrosion of Conformity (Blind), and Death Angel. Altogether, that was six and a half hours of heavy metal with very few chances to sit down and rest my legs and feet. I was fucking exhausted and it must have shown, because two different people (a nice metal head lady and a bouncer) offered to buy me bottled water. On the bright side, the heavy metal music was fucking awesome and my parents actually came to pick me up right after the show. That night (if 1:00 in the morning qualifies), I dreamed about singing with Lody Kong, playing a WWE game, and getting a boner in front of Susan. Weird fucking combination.

By the time today rolled along, I was dying for my obligatory alone time. After checking out of the hotel we were staying at the night before, my mom thought it would be a good idea to eat lunch in Port Orchard (even though I wasn’t hungry) and then exercise at the YMCA shortly after. Spiro’s ending up being a good choice for food since I got to drink a lot of iced tea. But when we got home, I wanted to go straight to bed and take a goddamn nap. Susan and Reina were in my room watching Guardians of the Galaxy and insisted on finishing it since it was almost over. Good God, I was pissed. And not only that, but James called later in the day and requested my help in moving his barbecue out of the apartment. I was so sure that I wasn’t going to get any free time to myself that I was going to explode. I was grumpy, pissed off, and tired. What was I going to do?

What made everything okay was when I was folding laundry with Mom, she told me that she empathized with my need for alone time. She’s retired now, but during her final few days at the EPA laboratory, different people would engage her in conversation while she was trying to get work done and it was stressful for her. Needless to say, we cancelled our trip to the Y for that day. When James showed up to come get me, he confessed that he was just as grumpy as me since he didn’t get any alone time either. All he wanted to do was read Game of Thrones and practice his drums while all I wanted to do was read Of Dice and Men and write stories. During the drive to and from his apartment, we talked about wrestling (which he isn’t a fan of, but humored me anyways) and Star Wars. You know, brother stuff.

And by the way, my mom and James are nowhere near as introverted as I am and they both get grumpy whenever they don’t have their alone time. Hell, when Reina tried to invade my room for the second time that day, Susan yelled at her and told her to leave me alone. Thank you, Susan.

If you want to be a friend to someone and hang out together, be respectful of his or her time. Don’t pick and activity that’s going to occupy their whole day and don’t be defensive when they demand alone time. Helping James move and going to see Cavalera Conspiracy were obligations that couldn’t be met on any other day. Exercising at the Y and watching science fiction movies on my TV are both gratuitous, which is probably where my real grumpiness came from. Be good to the introverts in your life and they will be good to you in return. We’ve got ears, say cheers!



We’ve got a doozy of a prompt this week. The guy who came up with it, Edward Therese, said he was only kidding when he invented it, but the admins wanted to use it anyways for its unique qualities. This week’s prompt is “Robot Overlord” and my story will be called “Demon Hunter”. It goes like this:




Jennifer Williams, “Demon Hunter”

Russell Condit, Psychologist

Shawn Blythe, Schizophrenic Tormentor


PROMPT CONFORMITY: Shawn has the ability to morph into a “robot overlord” while in hallucination mode.


SYNOPSIS: After coming home from Afghanistan with schizophrenia, Army Sergeant Jennifer Williams takes part in an experimental treatment procedure created by Dr. Russell Condit. The treatment involves being locked in a sensory deprivation room and being able to face schizophrenic voices in hand-to-hand combat without having to do it in real life and go to jail for it. Private Shawn Blythe was her biggest tormentor due to his sexist remarks and disregard for her authority while overseas. Dr. Condit’s chances of his experiment working are unknown as Jennifer is the first person to use it.


FUN FACT: The title of this story, Demon Hunter, is derived from the heavy metal band and Diablo III character class both of the same name.



“I’d rather go to a funeral than to this high school reunion.”

-Green Day-

  • Mood: Neutral
  • Listening to: Words You Say by The Moody Blues
  • Reading: Of Dice and Men by David M. Ewalt
  • Watching: Cavalera Conspiracy Concert
  • Playing: With Legos
  • Eating: Italian Sausage Sub
  • Drinking: Iced Tea


Garrison Kelly
Artist | Hobbyist | Literature
United States
Confessions of a Schizophrenic Savage is available where e-books are sold. Although American Darkness and Brawl-Mart are both currently on the market, I request that you not purchase a copy of either until both are fully edited and cleaned up.

Garrison’s Library:

Good Reads Author Profile:…

Sitka: June 19th, 2014 Cat of the Day:…

Q: How do you deal with writer’s block?
A: My favorite way to deal with writer’s block is by imagining the scenes of my stories from beginning to end. Sometimes when I’m alone (or at least when I’m sure I’m alone), I’ll do a back and forth dialogue between characters out loud. If it wasn’t for this method, the characters in my current novel Fireball Nightmare would all be two-dimensional wash-ups. It’s supposed to be a fast-paced bloodbath, but stories and emotions are just as important as the high-octane violence, if not more so.

Q: What’s your advice for aspiring writers?
A: Listen to your heart. Write about things you feel are important to you. Taking advice from others is okay and often recommended, but ultimately, you’re the one who makes the final decision on your writing, not the audience, not the editors, not the admins, just you and you alone. If somebody tells you your writing sucks, put as much distance as possible between yourself and that person. Nobody has the right to bring you down. If you still feel like your writing sucks, then keep working on it until it doesn’t. Never give up hope.

Q: How do you get inspired to write?
A: I draw inspiration from a lot of different sources whether they’re from other books or not. I’m a huge fan of heavy metal music and I often use it to channel aggressive feelings in my writing, especially during scenes of violence. I’m also a fan of professional wrestling as evidenced in my 2014 dark fantasy e-book Brawl-Mart. People like to criticize wrestling for being “fake” and I always tell them that Harry Potter is also fake, yet nobody’s complaining. Yet another source of creative fuel comes from the computer game Diablo II: Lord of Destruction. If it wasn’t for that game, I wouldn’t have such a fascination with barbarians. Deus Shadowheart, the main character of Fireball Nightmare, probably wouldn’t be a barbarian or even in existence if it wasn’t for Diablo II.

Q: Where did you get the idea for your most recent book?
A: When I was a child, I loved playing with Legos and I had a set from the pirate franchise that was a volcano with a swinging skull door in front. I called this set the Volcano of Doom and it has since been the inspiration for the main deity of Fireball Nightmare, Vahd (which is just a respelling of the acronym for Volcano of Doom (VOD)). Realistically, Fireball Nightmare is just an excuse for me to use a favorite barbarian character of mine named Deus Shadowheart and an idea I had for a dark fantasy apocalyptic role-playing game I made up called Valley of the Damned. When two kick-ass things come together, it’s instant magic. The makers of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup know this very well.

Q: Describe your desk.
A: It’s a hand-me-down from my older brother and has been in my possession since 2008. I have to be careful with it because it’s small and shakes easily. The upper tier has my computer screen, pencils, flash drives, and tissues on it. The middle tier holds my fan, house phone, speakers, tape player, keyboard, and sometimes a bottle of Diet Mountain Dew. The bottom tier is where my computer tower, printer, and power strips are located. In addition to writing stories and poetry, my rickety desk has also been used to draw some…interesting pictures.

Q: Where did you grow up, and how did this influence your writing?
A: I’ve lived in many places over the course of my childhood, but the one place where reality hit me the hardest was when I was going to high school in Chehalis, Washington. My freshman year was best known for the verbal bullying I have endured and almost committed suicide over. Due to the crippling PTSD (and eventual schizophrenia) I’ve suffered, most of my writing is influenced by dark and disturbing themes such as death, bullying, mental sickness, sex, and violence. I do have lighthearted stories in my archives, but I will always be known as an R-rated author.

Q: When did you first start writing?
A: I’ve been writing all of my life, but the time when I started taking it seriously was January of 2002. My first writing project was a videogame idea called Final Fantasy Hardcore. It had the same magical premise and romantic leanings as the games in the Final Fantasy series, but it was set in a dystopian future and had tons of mature content. My two favorite characters from this series are a charismatic barbarian named Deus Shadowheart and a perverted scientist named Dr. Scott Cain. Ever since scrapping Final Fantasy Hardcore, I’ve been trying to find a story for those two to be a part of. I think I’ve finally nailed it with a dark fantasy novel I’m currently writing called “Fireball Nightmare”.

Q: What’s the story behind your latest book?
A: My most recently published e-book as of now is American Darkness, which isn’t really a novel, but a collection of emotional short stories in a contemporary setting. There are 22 different stories jammed in this anthology, but the pride and joy of this series is one called “Another Brick in the Wall”, which obviously takes its name from the Pink Floyd songs. It is a classic verbal confrontation between a strict US History teacher named Sid McDonnell and a stressed out student named Sam Keith. This is a scenario I have always fantasized about, especially considering I had some rather unsavory teachers in high school and college who deserved a tongue-lashing.

Q: What motivated you to become an indie author?
A: My circumstances were the reason I chose self-publishing over traditional. I live in a town called Port Orchard, where young adult writers don’t have an outlet for their creativity. If I wanted to go somewhere to fulfill that need, it would have to be either Seattle, Bellingham, or Tacoma, all three of which are big cities that are too hard to get to. I don’t have a car or a driver’s license, so I have to depend on others for transportation. The people in my family who have driver’s licenses have schedules of their own and can’t ferry me to the big cities on a daily basis. Instead of stressing myself out by traveling to the big cities, I choose to use the internet to make my presence known. I have a lot of work to do in order to market myself, but I wouldn’t have self-published if I didn’t believe I could do it.

Q: How has Smash Words contributed to your success?
A: I haven’t sold very many e-books yet, but when the money starts rolling in, it will be because I chose Smash Words. Simply having a place where my writing can be immortalized is good enough for me. I write regularly on Deviant Art, Good Reads, Blogger, and Face Book. Smash Words is different from these places because it gives me a platform to organize my writing into a tangible product instead of just bits and pieces. Sometimes people need to see the bigger picture in order to make a decision about whether to be a member of an author’s audience.

Q: What is the greatest joy of writing for you?
A: Exercising my creativity is always a fun part of the business, but my favorite part comes from the feeling of accomplishment I get after I write something. I have taken something from my screwed up psyche and made something beautiful out of it. I liken this to the scene in the musical Pink Floyd the Wall where the main character smashes his hotel room in a fit of rage and afterwards makes a piece of art out of the remains. It’s a creepy way to think of my accomplishments, but then again, lots of creepy things go on in my mind.

Q: What do your fans mean to you?
A: My fans mean everything to me. Every time they give me a compliment or critique on my writing, it helps me become a better writer. Even if it’s a short compliment like “very well-written”, it’s enough to boost my confidence to continue putting myself out there. I’m shy at first, but when I begin to get comfortable with a group of people, we do so much for each other.

Q: What are you working on next?
A: It’s a dark fantasy novel called Fireball Nightmare. The first act, which is known as This Is Violence, deals with a forest-dwelling barbarian named Deus Shadowheart who will go to extreme means to protect his home from city developers. The main reason he does this is because he is a servant of the volcanic mountain god Vahd, who will erupt into apocalyptic fire if his forest is destroyed. The second act is called Valley of the Damned, but I won’t get into it right now because too much of the plot will have been revealed.

Q: Who are your favorite authors?
A: This is going to sound ironic coming from a lifelong writer, but I didn’t actually become a bookworm until 2009 when I picked up a copy of The Cleaner by Brett Battles. The books I read in college were slow-paced and dull while The Cleaner was exciting and quick. It’s because of this drastic change in pace that Brett Battles will always be my favorite author. Others include fellow introvert Susan Cain, Sherman Alexie, Carl Hiaasen, and Stephen Chbosky. Realistically, I’ll give my patronage to any author who can dictate a fast pace with his or her writing. Bonus points to go to any author who can almost bring me to tears. I haven’t cried since 2007, but I came very close to doing so with many of the authors I’ve read books from, particularly Stephen Chbosky.

Q: What inspires you to get out of bed each day?
A: To be honest, I don’t have much of a professional or social life in my small town of Port Orchard, Washington. To put it bluntly, I’m unemployed and have very few friends. I don’t have much of a reason to get out of bed every day, so the closest thing to inspiration I have is walking to the grocery store to get three giant bottles of Diet Mountain Dew. Walking is a fun exercise that helps me clear my mind, but more importantly, it’s an opportunity to rock out to heavy metal music on my MP3 player.



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saffronpanther Featured By Owner 3 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist…

I found this cute little vid about a child's favorite Thomas train toy being sent high in the sky. Aside from some animation effects added to make Stanley seem alive, the footage is real.
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner 2 days ago  Hobbyist Writer
Aww!! How cute! ^_^
saffronpanther Featured By Owner 2 days ago  Hobbyist General Artist
It is, isn't it?

Out of the current Take-N-Play range, there is a toy of Stanley with an oversized astronaut's helmet over his face and funnel, appropriately called "Stanley in Space". I was wondering if there was some episode I missed here he made it to space, somehow, so I went to Google. There, I found out that they made the toy in honor of this vid.
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner 2 days ago  Hobbyist Writer
Super cute! ^_^
(1 Reply)
saffronpanther Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Jesus H. Christ, Wal-Mart! Too violent?! Fuck!
saffronpanther Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
I thought it was because she was controversial, or something. But violent?
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner Apr 5, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
She's a cage fighter; it's her job to be violent.
(1 Reply)
saffronpanther Featured By Owner Mar 8, 2015  Hobbyist General Artist
Wario plays him some soccer.…
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner Mar 8, 2015  Hobbyist Writer
Indeed he does. Super Mario Strikers.
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