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***PHYSICAL CONTACT***

An American society is one where a man putting a hand on another man’s shoulder is considered “gay”, where backrubs leave the recipient wondering where the “happy ending” is, and where hugs are always considered awkward moments whenever they happen between people who barely know each other. It’s an unfortunate part of living in an uptight society, but it’s one we’ve always had.

You want to know my personal feelings on physical contact? As long as it isn’t violent or sexual, I’m not only okay with it, but I welcome it. Clean physical contact can be very comforting during stressful situations. It doesn’t take much, just a hair fuzzle, a soft hand on my back, or a gentle squeeze of my shoulder. Even if it was a complete stranger doing these things to me, I would find it peaceful.

I had a multi-genre writing professor at WWU named Carlos Martinez. He’s incredibly pleasant to be around even when he’s upset and he makes life easy for his students by not overloading them with stressful homework. Whenever he put his hand on my shoulder or upper back, I didn’t feel the least bit threatened. In fact, during a time when I was extremely fearful of constructive criticism, that little moment of clean physical contact was enough to put me at ease.

As far as shoulder rubs go, I’m all for them. Sometimes when I’m downstairs, I trade backrubs with my mom even though they only last for a short while (because of our hand durability). Does this mean I have a Freudian slip for my own Baby Boomer mother? Not only no, but hell no. I’ve even received backrubs from my own brother James. Does this make me an incestuous homosexual? Not even close. It’s a therapeutic experience we should all have someday. You want to know how far I would go with this? If Jeffrey Dahmer rose from the dead and massaged my back and shoulders, I would make zero attempts at escaping. Too extreme of an example? Well, that’s how I like things: too extreme and too soon.

I realize not everybody shares my liberal attitude when it comes to physical contact. There are people out there who don’t want to be touched at all, either because they’re anticipating sexual assault or have been sexually assaulted before. That’s why you should always make it a point to be careful around these people. There might be an instance where a finger poke could land you in the sex offender system. It can be ridiculous at times, but it’s still important to respect those boundaries. I always hope to myself that Carlos is still working at WWU and didn’t get in trouble for his clean touching. It would make me sad to hear about him losing his job or his freedom because of it. He was a damned good professor.

Where do you all stand on physical contact? Do you keep a tight barrier around yourself or do you let a few people in every once and a while? We’ve got ears, say cheers!

 

***AMERICAN DARKNESS***

After editing the hell out of Going Berserk, Heaven, and Hell in a Shell (I swear those biblical references are an accident), I only have three more chapters to touch up before American Darkness is ready for publication on Smash Words. The first one is a college berserk story called I Hate School. The second one is an erotic memoir called I’ll Be Your Man. The third one will be my most intimidating project since it stands at 11 pages long. The piece is called It’s Just a Story and focuses on a potentially sexist romance author named Lawrence Moody. There just might be a light at the end of the tunnel for me after all.

 

***GARRISON’S LIBRARY***

The next post that will grace my blog is in the couples category and is about Matt Hardy and Lita, who were both legitimate and kayfabe lovers while working in the WWE. When Lita had an affair with Edge, that’s when things spiraled out of control for all three people. The WWE became like Cheaters on steroids. Actually, it’s not nice to use a steroid reference when talking about the WWE.

 

***WRESTLING DIALOGUE OF THE DAY***

THE MIZ: I’ve got one question for you, DX: are you fifty?

JOHN MORRISON: I said! Are! You! Fifty?!

  • Mood: Neutral
  • Listening to: The Truth by Limp Bizkit
  • Reading: Dewey by Vicki Myron
  • Watching: Jeopardy
  • Playing: Piano
  • Eating: Porkchops
  • Drinking: Diet Mountain Dew

deviantID

Garrison-Kelly
Garrison Kelly
Artist | Professional | Literature
United States
Garrison Kelly has been writing creatively since January 2002 and made it official with an English degree in 2009 from Western Washington University. He’s tried to find work ever since completing school, but so far, no dice. His only source of income is through social security payments as he is mentally disabled with schizophrenia and autism. Mental illnesses are a favorite topic of his to discuss when writing, as are liberal politics, violent situations, anti-bullying politics, heavy metal music, and the occasional shy guy love story. Garrison’s favorite writers include, but are not limited to Carl Hiaasen, Lilian Jackson Braun, Brett Battles, and Susan Cain. Four flash drives full of first drafts along with reading countless novels has lead to the publication of three e-books and a blog, all of which can be found in the links below:

Dragon Machinegun: www.smashwords.com/books/view/…

Confessions of a Schizophrenic Savage: www.smashwords.com/books/view/…

Brawl Mart: www.smashwords.com/books/view/…

Garrison’s Library: garrisonslibrary.blogspot.com/
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:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Apr 12, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Here's one for ya. Since we've been talking about the Eds, do you have a favorite episode of the show? Mine is "An Ed is Born", the episode where the Eds attempt to make a video to "prove" how "grown up" Eddy's been to his brother.
Reply
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Apr 12, 2014  Professional Writer
My favorite episode is the one where Ed turns into a grump.
Reply
:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Apr 12, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Ah, "Little Ed Blue". Oh that death glare...

And Ed using Eddy as a bat to strike Kevin out of the park.
Reply
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Apr 12, 2014  Professional Writer
SARAH: Ed! You listen here, Mister! You can't kick me out! I live here too!

ED: SO MOVE!!
Reply
(1 Reply)
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Mar 29, 2014  Professional Writer
I know people that are like that.
Reply
:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Mar 29, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
Me too. I just found it amusing because of how it was made into a sporting move.
Reply
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Mar 29, 2014  Professional Writer
Maybe they'll make one called "The Flat Affect Garrison".
Reply
(1 Reply)
:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Mar 27, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
RAT [reading the newspaper]
Why do all of these obituaries say that so-and-so 'passed away peacefully'?

GOAT
What do you mean, 'why'?...because the person died peacefully.

RAT
Yeah, well, when I die, I'm gonna go out punching nurses and doctors, just so someone can finally say, 'He passed away violently'.

GOAT
What a goal.

RAT [fists raised]
Bring it on, Death!
Reply
:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Mar 26, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
ANDY
Bees? What kind of a science project is that?

LOUIE
I had a choice. It was either bees or dung beetles.

ANDY
You shoulda gone with the dung beetles! At least that's an insect you can work with.

LOUIE
So are you gonna help me?

ANDY [offended]
You kidding? Bees are vicious. They're nature's kamikaze pilots! They're bayonets with wings. My great uncle Thermador was destroyed by bees!

LOUIE
I thought he died of old age?

ANDY
Well, the bees destroyed his spirit first, and then old age got him. [He groans.]
Reply
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