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January 8, 2012
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***YANKEE DOODLE PARODIES***

Remember how you used to make fun of Yankee Doodle when you were a kid? Well, I just sang a bunch of disgusting parodies to my sister-in-law Susan and I'd thought I'd share a few of them with you. Things like, uh…


Yankee Doodle went to town playing with a Go-Bot. Stuck his head between his legs and gave himself a blowjob.

Yankee Doodle went to town riding in economy. Stuck a feather in his ear and called it a lobotomy.

Yankee Doodle went to town looking for extortion. Stuck a feather up his twat and called it an abortion.

Yankee Doodle went to town riding on a rocket. Stuck a feather up his butt and called it Hershey's Chocolate.

Yankee Doodle went to town riding on something. Stuck a feather up his ass and dropped a thunder dumpling.


That's all I have for today! Adios, amigos! Thanks for reading!


***COMEDIC QUOTE OF THE DAY***

"New rule: women have to stop having food orgasms. I've heard many women ask, 'Why don't they make a Viagra for women?' They do. It's called an M&M. There's nothing more humiliating than being in bed with a woman, and she calls out another man's name, and it's Willy Wonka."

-Bill Maher-
  • Listening to: And Justice For All by Metallica
  • Reading: For the Win by Cory Doctorow
  • Watching: Robot Chicken
  • Playing: With Legos
  • Eating: Peanut Butter
  • Drinking: Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi
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:icontrevorshallenberger:
trevorshallenberger Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013
yankee doodle went to town riding on a lady. he stuck his weiner up her crotch and called it making babies
Reply
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Professional Writer
Hehehehehe! Good one!
Reply
:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Thunder dumpling.
Reply
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2012  Professional Writer
Thunder! Thunder! Thunder! Thunder dumpling! HOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!
Reply
:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Sounds like a band name. Or a Chinese food dish.
Reply
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2012  Professional Writer
Sounds appetizing, but it's not.
Reply
:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
I don't think so. It sounds like a warning.
Reply
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner Jan 9, 2012  Professional Writer
A warning as obvious as a boner at the chalkboard.
Reply
:iconsaffronpanther:
saffronpanther Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2012  Hobbyist General Artist
Or a dagger floating over your head, MacBeth style.
Reply
:icongarrison-kelly:
Garrison-Kelly Featured By Owner Jan 10, 2012  Professional Writer
Or an anvil falling out of the sky.
Reply
(1 Reply)
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